When I was a little girl I dreamed of the day that I would wear a big poofy dress and get married, the day where I would wear the black graduation gown and get my college degree, the day I would wear a hospital gown and give birth to my children - yes, plural, children! I however never dreamed of the day these words would enter my vocabulary.
Sonogram
Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)
Infertility
Clomid
Blood work
Clomid
Blood work
Clomid
Blood work
Sonogram
HCG Trigger Injections
Blood work
Miscarriage :-(
Uterine Biopsy
Sonogram
Letrozole
Sonogram
Sonogram
HCG Trigger Injections
Blood work
Whew - exhausting and emotionally draining! 7 months of trying to have another baby and 5 months of fertility treatments. For us in our marriage, this is our struggle. We have been blessed enough to not have financial problems (and pray we never do), we have not had to experience the loss of a parent or sibling (thank goodness), but yet we have had to grieve the loss of an unborn child. The statistics are so high for miscarriages, most women experience one in their lifetime. And 1 out of 10 women have fertility problems.
We tried for 2 years before we conceived Corbin. At that time we had no idea that I was having fertility issues. I had always had irregular periods and always chalked it up to being athletic and thin. Thin until I got married and started eating whatever I wanted - but that's another story!! Its when we finally "gave up" trying to have a baby and took at 6 month break that we were blessed with our miracle baby! We built a house and bam! Knocked up:-) I went into a Reproductive Endocrinologist to see why I had been having a hard time conceiving and I found out via sonogram that I was already 6 weeks pregnant with my first blessing!! And what a blessing he has been to me - almost 2 years old and I can't imagine my life without him!!! I can't sing his praises enough:-)
Also, Thank God I have the best, most supportive husband to help me through all this. I'm so blessed to have him!
We started trying in November 2009 to give him a sibling knowing that it would take a while. Little did we know it would take this long and counting. We went back to the same Reproductive Endocrinologist to follow up and that is when the diagnosis came - PCOS - yikes! All this means is I don't ovulate. If I do, as in the case of Corbin, its random and sporadic. There is no rhyme or reason, just random. We did 3 rounds/months of fertility treatments with him before we decided that we needed to move on.
I'm now seeing the most wonderful RE and she is amazing, hopeful, and aggressive! She too is a PCOS patient, she went through the same treatments I am in order to get her son, and she is such a blessing to have in my life right now.
Even with all these wonderful blessings in my life, every month is a disappointment when my period comes. I cry, I get depressed, I get mad, upset, frustrated! I think the strength of the Lord is my safe place right now and He keeps me going. I just have to keep reminding myself that the Lord works in His own timing and maybe He has other plans for the Richwine Family.
So - here we are - standing on the edge of another month - not knowing the results. I pretty much had to have many breakdowns before I have hit the place I am at today. We will just keep trucking - keep praying, keep believing, and keep hoping that soon we will be blessed with another miracle:-)
No comments:
Post a Comment